Differentiating

"Don't compare yourself to her. You aren't not the same. There are things that she is that you will never be and vice versa. But that doesn't mean she is better/worse. Just different."

Sounds like the diversity class I took when I started my corporate bureaucrat job. All people are beautiful, equal...blah blah. Yeah, we are. I get that. We should celebrate diversity in people. But, yet, societal norms preach to us differently.

Look this way, walk this way, use this product, and you will be "in".

So when you are 35, a bit (ok, more than a bit) overweight, wearing glasses, with less than perfect hair, a bit of a odd shaped nose, stretch marks, and big feet - well, darlin, society starts to devalue you. And while everything I've been taught tells me that we should celebrate diversity - somewhere down the line, you start to feel crappy about the things you aren't. I have days when I look in the mirror and think, "hey, I'm not so bad, in fact, I look pretty good" and then there are days, like today, when I look in the mirror and think "I shoulda applied for extreme makeover".

I'm not young. (not old yet, just not young) I'm not a size 6. (never was, as a matter of fact, even when I was thin) But, our society's standards of beauty say that to be beautiful you indeed must be young, and thin. (and a nice rack doesn't hurt)

Most of society isn't young and thin. I don't think most of society really buys it. But its shoved in our faces (male and female).

So, yeah, we are different. Not better, nor worse. But if you put the two of us in a room and were forced to choose, society would choose her.

Maybe that's why its hard not to think I'm worse. Because I can differentiate. I know why we are different. And I also know that she is closer to the societal standard than I am.

And yeah, I shouldn't listen to society - I should only listen to you. But its hard to turn the world out.