Smelling the Crap vs the Roses

Don't the hours grow shorter as the days go by
You never get to stop and open your eyes
One minute you're waiting for the sky to fall
The next you're dazzled by the beauty of it all

Lover's in a Dangerous Time - Barenaked Ladies

Life sneaks up on you. One day, you are 21 with your eyes full of light and wonder, and the whole world is your playground. The next day you are 35, and you wonder where the days have gone, and begin to realize that things are neither as wonderful or as terrible as they seem.

So much time I have spent waiting for the sky to fall. Worry upon worry piling up until it is an insurmountable mountain.

Too few times have I been dazzled by the beauty of it all. Not that I haven't seen it. I've seen a little boy become a little angel, and I've experienced the joy of parenthood. But not enough have I looked around and seen the beauty in life's moments.

I've always had this weird ability to stand outside myself, and record events for later recollection or use. Almost as if I am storing things for a later biography. Not really an autobiography, because I can almost see my life as someone else may see it.

If I indeed were to take stock of life thus far, I would say that I need to spend more time finding those moments of incredible beauty. So that when the sky does fall, I am not burdened by its weight.

Later in the above quoted song, the lyrics say:

Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight
You gotta kick at the darkness till it bleeds daylight.

Life has its periods of darkness, indeed. But with the tiniest bit of hope, there is light.