Sorrow

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. ~Kahlil Gibran
We weep for the things we have loved. True sorrow is based on the fact that we have lost something that was integral to our lives, our happiness. Sorrow is selfish. Even in the face of losing someone who suffered greatly, our sorrow centers on the fact that the "I" no longer can have that person in their lives.

I've lost four people in my life now who suffered greatly. All integral to my life and happiness. Three were old. They had lived full, rich lives. Each expressed readiness, if not eagerness to get the hell off planet Earth. They were tired. For one of them, I was given the gift of being with her when she passed. The pain I felt was not for her, but for me. For her, I felt relief. I felt her joy.

One was young. So very young. And had suffered as well. In many ways, he had lived an even fuller, richer life. He taught me so many things about love, compassion and courage. Not with words, but with his outstretched arms ... his big cheesey grin. He loved unconditionally. With no expectations other than you love him back. Oh, and maybe some gummi's.

We can wrap ourselves in a blanket of sorrow, and pine for that we've lost. And that's ok. To allow yourself to feel the pain of a life or love lost is to be human. But it is when we remember why we feel the pain in the first place, that we begin to understand our live's truest loves ... our truest joy.